Creating Yourself

"Life
isn’t about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself."

George
Bernard Shaw

I love the quote above. It could almost serve as an anthem for
life coaching. Sometimes clients who start life coaching believe the process
will focus solely on uncovering and discovering who they are.

But there’s so much more to it than that. Discovery—or
“finding yourself”—is often part of the initial prep work you do with a life
coach. This leg of the journey usually involves the past, looking back to gain
a sense of why you “are where you are” in your personal and professional life.

But then the real work of life coaching begins—the deep
creative work that is about changing your life rather than just understanding
it. It’s about becoming the person who you have the potential to be, rather
than simply processing what’s already happened.

How do you go about creating yourself? It’s a process that you
work through in partnership with your life coach. By trying some of the following
ideas when you feel ready for them, you can help facilitate the journey:

Build on
what’s true for you.
There’s so much advice now on every
possible subject, from every possible source, particularly online. But only
some of it will be right for you. A life coach can help guide you toward what’s
true for you, after you’ve clearly identified it. But you must be the one to
really feel that truth, and act on your desire to expand on it.

“Your truth” may sound like a vague concept, but what it means
is what’s uniquely and authentically you. It’s not what others want you to do,
or what you think you should do; it’s who you are. Still not sure how to find
your truth? Use the point below as a barometer to help lead you to it.

Follow
your comfort and happiness.
When you’re following your truth, life
flows easily, time passes quickly, and you feel good. You aren’t hampered by frequent
obstacles, negative thoughts, or difficult encounters. Your truth is often not
the obvious thing, or the most impressive. It’s just the thing that comes
easily to you, and that you love to do so much, you would do it for free.

Use what
you know to grow.
Another way to create yourself is to turn lessons you’ve
learned the hard way into something better. It’s not enough to understand why
certain mistakes happened—kick it up a notch, and find ways to apply that
knowledge toward shaping your future decisions.

Honor
the creative process.
Self-creation is like any other kind of
art. It needs certain circumstances to produce the best outcome. Determine what
you need to best make this happen.

The following actions may help you in your
creative journey:

• Give yourself quiet
time, away from other influences.
It’s much harder to get in touch with
what you really want when others are trying to persuade you of their views.

• Don’t over-schedule.
If you keep yourself constantly busy, you won’t have the time you need to work
on yourself. Be sure to keep at least some time each day for yourself.

• Write in a journal.
Writing down your thoughts can help you tap into ideas about what you want that
you may not have realized. If you prefer more structured writing instead of
free-form, ask your life coach for some specific journal-writing exercises.

• Be patient.
Creating yourself is a lifelong process, not something that’s finished in an
afternoon. Celebrate small victories as you move ever-closer to a more
authentic you.

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